Sunday, August 16, 2015
When I have finished weaving a small collection of 4 or 5 scarves, that seem to belong together, because of the warp and the color and design combinations, I list them for sale in my etsy shop. This most recent batch has materialized around old school, plaid dresses, that came to mind as I wove. I remember the school dresses my mother sewed for me at this time of year, no doubt, with white collars and cuffs, and me impatiently standing on a chair, turning slowly, while she pinned the hems. The afternoon light has shifted to a warmer tint, a light golden wash, end of summer.
This is how I weave, always. Colors come from memories of light at different seasons, different times of day. There are combinations in my brain from my mother's kitchen curtains, or the wallpaper in my best friend' s bedroom. But the memory of color can come from anywhere, or anytime. I weave to hold it down, to see it better, to get closer to an emotion connected to the color. Often I can't identify where the color comes from that feels so familiar. Cloth carries feeling with its color, texture and design. We hold it, and it conforms to our human shapes.
I never thought weaving would be so important to me. I'm a little self conscious to be so
obsessed with it, and always wish I were a truly gifted weaver. I've been weaving many years, but I often feel clumsy at my looms. What I may lack in technical virtuosity, I make up for in feeling. I hope that feeling carries to whoever owns it. I want there to be something in the cloth that expresses the ideas that went into its making, even if the keeper has no idea who made it. I keep cloth like that, made by someone unknown to me, that radiates another human's imagination, and excites me.
So, I make a series of scarves and put them up for sale, happy to think of them worn by real human beings, in places I may never get to visit. The workshop feels so empty then, and I wonder if there is anything left to look forward to. Then, slowly, something takes shape in my mind's eye, as I pick up colors again, and throw my shuttles.